Happy Birthday!

Well, this is it. The day that Joel has been anticipating and I have been dreading! My wonderful boy, my son, turns thirteen years old today. It's hardly possible to think about, but it's here and I have no choice but to put on a happy face and not dwell on the fact that he is no longer my baby boy, but now a young man.

In September of 1993, Joel was nothing but a grain of faith. He was a dream, a longing of this mother's heart, promised to me by God through our Pastor at the time, Tim Hill. Two months later, he was being formed and created, and he was faith realized. Seven months after that, in June of 1994, my son became my dream come true. At that moment, holding a 3 lb, 14 oz little boy, my world took on a different dimension, and if I never accomplished anything else in life, I know that I had fulfilled my greatest purpose.

Only God knew the path he carved out for us and for Joel, and only He has been able to help us with each and every aspect of his life, from his premature birth, to some of the difficulties that came along with it. And it is only every other minute or so that I realize how truly great He is.

I am not one of those mother's who thinks her child can do no wrong....I know he can, and he does. I know that there are still many, many things for him to learn about the choices he makes and how they will affect the rest of his life. However, I also know what kind of person he is at the core of himself. He has a drive and determination that can't be described. He is a pleaser and would go out of his way to make sure that you are pleased with him. He wants to help, and he wants to give. He brings joy to us, and to those around him. He is so different from me in that he is just a friend magnet. He meets new ones everywhere he goes and thrives being surrounded by people.

It has been so pleasing to watch as certain loves in his life are coming forth. He absolutely loves to fish...well, that's in his genes....from his grandfathers. There are other things that he loves, too, and they would seem to come from loves that are handed down from generation to generation. He is competitive and loves to win, and when his team looses, he takes the loss personally, on his shoulders and bears the weight of it. It is troubling sometimes to watch, but also very revealing about his character. He is the first to help someone up, pick-up something a stranger has dropped for them, or hold the door open for a stranger....and he is also the one who will hold the door shut for a friend to bring a laugh. He tries to lie, but he can't. I almost feel sorry for him. Almost.

I have so many hopes and dreams for him and his future, however, I know that they are nothing compared to the plans and will of our Father for his life. From the time he was born, he has been favored by God. His hand upon his life has been so evident through these past 13 years, sometimes invisible to anyone but us, and other times visible by many(baseball Allstars, baby!). It is with much joy and anticipation that I look forward to watching him become the young man I know he will. I pray for so many things for him, but I also am praying that God helps me be the Mom to him that he needs, to help guide and steer him in the right directions, to help him when he stumbles, and to help him know that he is always loved unconditionally, not only by God, but by his parents, too, because that's the way that Jesus loves us....unconditionally.

So, if you happen to see my blue-eyed, blond haired young man this week, give him a hug and tell him Happy Birthday, then say a silent prayer for his teenage years. And when you've done that, say a silent prayer for his mom, she will probably need it more than him!

On Seeking God

I thought I would share the devotion I am meditating on this week. It comes from my "Busy Mom's Guide to Wisdom" journal by Lisa Whelchel. In this book, you are given a different proverb each week, and a short insight to pray and think over during the week. Here's where I'm at:

You have to want to KNOW God

more than anything else in the

world. Worship Him and actually

look for Him, and you WILL find Him.

Proverbs 2:4-5, paraphrased.

"If I offered you a parenting book that had all the answers you've ever wanted regarding how to raise the healthiest, happiest, and godliest children ever, would you devour that book, or would you leave it on the nightstand for days on end without picking it up? What if I gave you a map and told you that all you had to do was follow the directions on the map, grab a shovel, and dig deep, then you would surely find untold wealth; what would you do? I doubt you'd be too busy or think the map was too old to pay attention to or decide it wasn't worth the time and energy necessary to dig for it. And yet, too often, that's how we respond to the offer to know God and to find the wealth of wisdom He promises. Do we not think the opportunity to personally know the Creator of the universe is worth a little effort? I would think that having infinite wisdom available to us would be pretty valuable. You do too? Great -- then pick up the nearest Bible and dig. There's treasure just waiting to be found."

There is something just so exciting about scripture coming alive to me. I still marvel at how I can be feeling a certain way, or needing reassurances, and open the Word and start reading and the words just leap off of the page to my heart, giving me that calm reassurance that I need to keep on going. And I am at the place in my life where I just want to know Him more than anything. I want Him, and His knowledge, and His ways, because I've tried it on my own, and Lord knows that my ways only work for a little while. But His ways and thoughts are so much higher than mine. So in my meditating this week, I am praying and planning how I can get more of Him. It may sound weird to say I'm planning to get more of God, but I have found that in my crazy, busy, schedule jam-packed filled life, if I don't plan to spend time with God, I miss out on that special time with Him.

So I'm worshipping, and looking for Him. The best part of all is that He is just waiting to be found.

Joy

A diamond in the dirt

The past few weeks, our lives have seemingly been overtaken by a diamond in the dirt. For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, it's a baseball diamond. You know...that square patch of dirt with white boxes in each corner...where everyone from children to grown men spend countless amounts of time trying to hit a little ball with a stick and run from points A to B to C to make getting to D count. This spring, both of my children signed up to play, and on one hand it's been very rewarding and on the other it has proven to be a very frustrating experience.

Greg. loves. baseball. It's his sport, his thing. It's what he spent the majority of his youth involved in. Whether he played for the local pony league, for Hargrave, or for the Martinsville Oilers, he loved to play. It's a game he knows, and stepping back into baseball after being gone from it for so long has been a seamless transition for him. His heart is overflowing once again with love for the game and all of this baseball has taken him back to the glory of his youth. (Lord, help me!)

However, for one young son who has spent uncountable hours practicing, playing, and perfecting the game of soccer, the move to baseball has not been so easy. We're learning so much through this, and believe you me....it's not always been an enjoyable experience. Going from a team where you are a leader and anchor to playing on a team where you just want to get off the bench has been a humbling experience for my soon to be teenager. Joel has learned that the game is not quite as easy as it looks. It has taken many, many weeks, and much practice and last night he finally came home triumphant because he got a hit! Too bad this was only practice....if he ever does it in a game, he just might get so excited he won't make it around the bases. Not only is the hitting hard to get used to, but the pace of the game is really different as well. So as much as I don't like the everyday practices, two and a half hour games, frustrations and "discussions", it has already ended up being a good learning experience for him. And we're finding so many teaching opportunities in it.


Julia loves her girls softball team. She likes it so much better than soccer. It's non-contact (for the most part). It doesn't require too much running, and it doesn't seem to interfere with the other things she loves to do. We'll see how she does.


For me, baseball is an opportunity to just sit back and relax while watching my children play. It doesn't involve the same amount of emotion and adrenaline as soccer. It's something that I played, so I can get out and play with them, and it's one more thing that we can spend time doing together.


And isn't that the point of it all, anyway?


Blessings!

Overwhelming

Dear Father in heaven,

-- hear the song of my heart today --

The more I seek You--

the more I find You--

the more I find You--

the more I love You--

I want to sit at your feet

drink from the cup in Your hand

lay back against you and breath

feel Your heartbeat

this love is so deep

it's more than I can stand

I melt in Your peace

it's overwhelming