Something I've discovered recently is how much I have changed my focus as a parent. No longer am I trying to teach my children the difference between right and wrong, hopefully that's pretty much done (thank goodness for that), but I am now moving into a phase where the questions are harder, the situations more complex, and the ability to mold and shape the character of my children is really in my hands. It's a weighty thought for me.
It is my desire and intention to teach my son and daughter all aspects of life, not just the good. We (Greg and I) have tried really hard not to make our children into who WE want them to be, but for them to become who God wants them to be. It's not easy -- looking at your children through non-speckled glasses. We as parents want them to be the most beautiful, the smartest, the fastest, the best, the one who always gets picked at everything but real life is not like that. But oh how we set ourselves up for disappointment if we only see them how we want too and not for who they really are.
So how do we do that? It starts with the knowledge that my children are not mine. I gave both of them to God before they were born, just so thankful to be allowed to be their mother. They are not toys or able to be programmed, but tiny humans with a will and path of their own. I am simply fortunate that for the first 18 years or so of their lives, their path goes the same direction as mine. It also means that I, as a parent have to know the strengths and weaknesses, good and bad, pretty and the ugly of both my children. If I only work to bolster their strengths and never teach them to overcome their weaknesses, then I have failed to prepare them for the real world. If I only provide for them the highs of life, and never teach them about the lows and how to deal with them, again, I have failed to prepare them for the real world.
Let's face it, the real world is not all roses. It's ugly sometimes, and at times it's really not fair. So if I can teach them now that when they are angry and frustrated because life isn't going their way to take all of that stuff that's inside them and take it to God and say -- "Here Lord, I have all this junk inside of me that is keeping me from being the man or woman I want to be. Take it so I can focus on being the child of God you've called me to be - one of integrity, character, with a GREAT ATTITUDE." -- then when situations come in life they will know how to deal with it and move on and not dwell in that place. We don't prepare our children to fail, but to know how to deal with failure (or what feels like failure) and disappointment when it comes.
Where is all of this coming from? It has come from Joel being in a place he's never been before....sitting the bench. It happens sometimes. Everyone else seems to be in the game, and even though we want to play and we have the skills and abilities necessary, sometimes it's just our time to sit the bench. We get hurt and have to sit out. We are in a growth spurt causing our joints to stretch painfully and we have to sit out. And sometimes the Coach just knows that it's just not our time. Sitting the bench is hard. Watching people get to do things that you want to do and not be able to do them too, is hard. Being made to feel like you're not as good as others by people who don't know what's going on is hard. But in this game called life, I want my children to know that there is much good to come from sitting the bench. Our bodies gain healing from sitting the bench. Our minds and spirits restored while sitting the bench. Our mission and purpose are supercharged and more clearly defined while sitting on the bench. Our passion for the game we are sitting out of is restored while sitting on the bench watching others play. Sitting on the bench provides opportunities to really look at our team mates and give them an encouraging word when needed. Sitting on the bench is when our character is truly sharpened and we are not necessarily seen for what we can do, but for who we are.
Playing the game or sitting the bench, if I can instill the fact that His light is what needs to shine through us at both places...well, I've done the job I was supposed to do - or at least one of them anyway! Now...on to the next!
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Sunday, September 14, 2008
He is Here
This is just one thing taken away from an awesome weekend with my Lord....Enjoy!
Blessings!
Joy
Friday, September 05, 2008
The Roman Road
When I was growing up at home, my father (who was also the Pastor then) would often advise young Christians to begin their journey with the Lord in the book of Romans. I can remember him telling them to walk the Roman Road with Paul. Of course, this was many, many years ago and that had totally left my mind until one morning I was sitting having devotions while on vacation last month when I could clearly once again hear his words in my head and felt the Lord drawing me to take a walk with him down the Romans Road.
I have since completed my journey down the Romans Road and cannot even begin to tell you how much the Lord spoke to me through those passages of scripture. I read it in the Message version of the Bible, usually reading just a chapter a night and night after night, I found myself faced with foundational truths that are often over looked by some Christians.
Out of everything I learned, relearned and discovered, the Lord spoke to my heart the most through Romans chapter 5. Could it be because patience is what God is trying to develop in me? Or maybe it's because He just wanted to confirm to me the "Spacious Place" that He longs for me to live in. Read what He is saying:
3-5 There's more to come: We continue to shout our praise even when we're hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next. In alert expectancy such as this, we're never left feeling shortchanged. Quite the contrary—we can't round up enough containers to hold everything God generously pours into our lives through the Holy Spirit!
6-8 Christ arrives right on time to make this happen. He didn't, and doesn't, wait for us to get ready. He presented himself for this sacrificial death when we were far too weak and rebellious to do anything to get ourselves ready. And even if we hadn't been so weak, we wouldn't have known what to do anyway. We can understand someone dying for a person worth dying for, and we can understand how someone good and noble could inspire us to selfless sacrifice. But God put his love on the line for us by offering his Son in sacrificial death while we were of no use whatever to him.
9-11 Now that we are set right with God by means of this sacrificial death, the consummate blood sacrifice, there is no longer a question of being at odds with God in any way. If, when we were at our worst, we were put on friendly terms with God by the sacrificial death of his Son, now that we're at our best, just think of how our lives will expand and deepen by means of his resurrection life! Now that we have actually received this amazing friendship with God, we are no longer content to simply say it in plodding prose. We sing and shout our praises to God through Jesus, the Messiah!
WOW! When I was at my worst, I was put on friendly terms with God through the death of Jesus. So unworthy....that's how I feel. Did you catch the part in verse 2 where Paul is telling us of the wide-open spaces that the Lord longs for us to live in? I sure did. And the more I read, the more my spiritual eyes were opened to see that if we live in the wide-open spaces that He has called us too, then verse 5 truly becomes a reality for our lives in that we cannot round up enough containers to hold all that God is pouring into us by his Spirit.
That is the place I am now. God is doing so much in my life that I have a hard time forming the words to truly praise Him the way that my soul longs too. Revival has come to my spirit in a way it never has before....I have a true hunger for the Word that I never had before. I could spend days just reading and soaking it all in. There is an thirst for more of Him that I cannot quench no matter how much time I spend in prayer and study. Everyday, there is some new way that I am able to rejoice in Him because of His revelation to me or someone close to me! If I was able, I would steal away somewhere, just me and Jesus for as long as I could stand to be with Him. Just so that I could give Him my undivided attention. Right now, I am so thankful that I am able to spend the time with him that I do, which has really increased since my children are older. But I want MORE. My soul cries out for More -- more of Him and less of me, more time with Him, more knowledge of Him, so much more that I can hardly recognize myself for seeing Him. And I am determined that no matter what it takes I will continue until I get all that He has for me and I become the daughter He designed for me to be! I may be 80 years old and still on this journey, but I will not quit - the reward will be worth it all.
I love living "out in the open, into a spacious, free life". (Romans 8:6b)
So, if your stumped...if you don't know where to start...if you need direction...I encourage you take a walk down the Roman Road. There's no better place than the spacious place He's designed just for you.
Blessings!
Joy
I have since completed my journey down the Romans Road and cannot even begin to tell you how much the Lord spoke to me through those passages of scripture. I read it in the Message version of the Bible, usually reading just a chapter a night and night after night, I found myself faced with foundational truths that are often over looked by some Christians.
Out of everything I learned, relearned and discovered, the Lord spoke to my heart the most through Romans chapter 5. Could it be because patience is what God is trying to develop in me? Or maybe it's because He just wanted to confirm to me the "Spacious Place" that He longs for me to live in. Read what He is saying:
1-2 By entering through faith into what God has always wanted to do for us—set us right with him, make us fit for him—we have it all together with God because of our Master Jesus. And that's not all: We throw open our doors to God and discover at the same moment that he has already thrown open his door to us. We find ourselves standing where we always hoped we might stand—out in the wide open spaces of God's grace and glory, standing tall and shouting our praise.
3-5 There's more to come: We continue to shout our praise even when we're hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next. In alert expectancy such as this, we're never left feeling shortchanged. Quite the contrary—we can't round up enough containers to hold everything God generously pours into our lives through the Holy Spirit!
6-8 Christ arrives right on time to make this happen. He didn't, and doesn't, wait for us to get ready. He presented himself for this sacrificial death when we were far too weak and rebellious to do anything to get ourselves ready. And even if we hadn't been so weak, we wouldn't have known what to do anyway. We can understand someone dying for a person worth dying for, and we can understand how someone good and noble could inspire us to selfless sacrifice. But God put his love on the line for us by offering his Son in sacrificial death while we were of no use whatever to him.
9-11 Now that we are set right with God by means of this sacrificial death, the consummate blood sacrifice, there is no longer a question of being at odds with God in any way. If, when we were at our worst, we were put on friendly terms with God by the sacrificial death of his Son, now that we're at our best, just think of how our lives will expand and deepen by means of his resurrection life! Now that we have actually received this amazing friendship with God, we are no longer content to simply say it in plodding prose. We sing and shout our praises to God through Jesus, the Messiah!
WOW! When I was at my worst, I was put on friendly terms with God through the death of Jesus. So unworthy....that's how I feel. Did you catch the part in verse 2 where Paul is telling us of the wide-open spaces that the Lord longs for us to live in? I sure did. And the more I read, the more my spiritual eyes were opened to see that if we live in the wide-open spaces that He has called us too, then verse 5 truly becomes a reality for our lives in that we cannot round up enough containers to hold all that God is pouring into us by his Spirit.
That is the place I am now. God is doing so much in my life that I have a hard time forming the words to truly praise Him the way that my soul longs too. Revival has come to my spirit in a way it never has before....I have a true hunger for the Word that I never had before. I could spend days just reading and soaking it all in. There is an thirst for more of Him that I cannot quench no matter how much time I spend in prayer and study. Everyday, there is some new way that I am able to rejoice in Him because of His revelation to me or someone close to me! If I was able, I would steal away somewhere, just me and Jesus for as long as I could stand to be with Him. Just so that I could give Him my undivided attention. Right now, I am so thankful that I am able to spend the time with him that I do, which has really increased since my children are older. But I want MORE. My soul cries out for More -- more of Him and less of me, more time with Him, more knowledge of Him, so much more that I can hardly recognize myself for seeing Him. And I am determined that no matter what it takes I will continue until I get all that He has for me and I become the daughter He designed for me to be! I may be 80 years old and still on this journey, but I will not quit - the reward will be worth it all.
I love living "out in the open, into a spacious, free life". (Romans 8:6b)
So, if your stumped...if you don't know where to start...if you need direction...I encourage you take a walk down the Roman Road. There's no better place than the spacious place He's designed just for you.
Blessings!
Joy
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Prayer Power
"It is our tendency to believe that history belongs to the powerful, the wealthy, the corporations, or the global media enterprises. But it doesn't. History belongs to the intercessors. Think about it: Moses' prayer changed the destiny of a nation; Daniel's prayer of forgiveness brought about a fresh pouring of God's grace; Jesus told the stories of the persistent widow and of the persistent neighbor for a reason. Prayer changes things, no matter how big or small. By devoting ourselves to this vital discipline, we can draw upon that same power." ~ Unknown.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
A new hero
Monday night was a very unusual night for me. On Monday's, I normally try to get one to those chores done that seems to stay on my list. You know ~ the ones that you know have to be done ~ you just hate doing them. For me, it was time to tackle the coat closet. Ugh! Just the thought made me want to postpone, but honestly, I've been postponing for two years, so tackle the closet I did.
Normally, I will put on some type of music while I'm working this way, but Monday I decided to put the channel on MLB's Home Run Derby. Little did I know that it was not by chance I chose that to watch.
So, here I am, cleaning out the closet, piles of scarves, hats, gloves, coats, etc. all over my living room, and a guy comes up to hit by the name of Josh Hamilton and suddenly my eyes are glued to the television and I sat down.
Before Monday night, I had never heard of Josh Hamilton but the moment he came up to hit, I was immediately prompted by the Holy Spirit to watch. And watch I did. And then I cried and without restraint, began praying as I was led by the Holy Spirit for this professional baseball player for the Texas Rangers that I had never heard of before all the while watching history being made. I was not praying for him to make history. No, I was prompted to pray for his protection, favor, and strength as he uses the game of baseball to impact lives for eternity. Interceding on his behalf in a most powerful way. Thinking of it even now brings tears to my eyes.
This has really only happened to me once before that I recall. I remember laying in my bed watching George Bush accept the nomination for the republican party the first time he was running for president and the Lord sending me to my knees in tears and intercession for him. I couldn't have stopped the prayers if I had wanted too! And it felt much the same this time.
If you don't know or haven't heard of Josh Hamilton, here is a link to his personal testimony:
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1861466/posts
He, like many others, had to hit rock bottom to be able to look up and see that his salvation only came from above. That he is not dead is amazing, but his rise to the place he's in now is truly a miracle for today.
All of this really caused me to ponder why the Lord would want me to pray for him. Surely my prayers are no more powerful than anyone else's. Maybe it was just that I was watching and my heart was positioned to follow the prompting of the spirit. Or maybe it's because He just wanted to see if I would obey. Whatever the reason, it brought to my mind that several weeks ago when I called and listened to a message on my answering machine from a precious lady in our church who called to let me know she had been praying that morning and the Lord had prompted her to pray for me! She was just calling to let me know she was praying and making sure I was OK. Our church is so big now, that I don't even get to see her most Sundays, and I know that I hadn't shared with anyone my struggles (because I don't do that...at all....and it's not always a good thing) so how overwhelming it was for me to get that call. It was just the Lord's way of letting me know that He had not forgotten me, and He was helping me through, and boy did I need it.
It has made me realize that anytime the Lord prompts us to pray that it is so important to obey. There are lives, hurts, grief, spiritual battles, and more that hang in the balance. What a precious gift it is to be able to go the the Father on someones behalf...fighting with them....often times when they are unable to fight for themselves.
So, now I have a new hero in today's world. A man whose life was being destroyed by sin, but who God wanted to use to bring honor and glory unto him. A professional athlete that my son can look up to. Someone who is not ashamed to give thanks to his "Lord and Savior Jesus Christ" in front of millions of people. And it seems I also have a new baseball team to pull for and a new favorite player!!
Sounds to me like he's living in a spacious place...delighted in by the Father, and rescued. Psalm 18:19. And isn't that what life in Christ is all about?
Blessings!
Joy
Normally, I will put on some type of music while I'm working this way, but Monday I decided to put the channel on MLB's Home Run Derby. Little did I know that it was not by chance I chose that to watch.
So, here I am, cleaning out the closet, piles of scarves, hats, gloves, coats, etc. all over my living room, and a guy comes up to hit by the name of Josh Hamilton and suddenly my eyes are glued to the television and I sat down.Before Monday night, I had never heard of Josh Hamilton but the moment he came up to hit, I was immediately prompted by the Holy Spirit to watch. And watch I did. And then I cried and without restraint, began praying as I was led by the Holy Spirit for this professional baseball player for the Texas Rangers that I had never heard of before all the while watching history being made. I was not praying for him to make history. No, I was prompted to pray for his protection, favor, and strength as he uses the game of baseball to impact lives for eternity. Interceding on his behalf in a most powerful way. Thinking of it even now brings tears to my eyes.
This has really only happened to me once before that I recall. I remember laying in my bed watching George Bush accept the nomination for the republican party the first time he was running for president and the Lord sending me to my knees in tears and intercession for him. I couldn't have stopped the prayers if I had wanted too! And it felt much the same this time.
If you don't know or haven't heard of Josh Hamilton, here is a link to his personal testimony:
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1861466/posts
He, like many others, had to hit rock bottom to be able to look up and see that his salvation only came from above. That he is not dead is amazing, but his rise to the place he's in now is truly a miracle for today.
All of this really caused me to ponder why the Lord would want me to pray for him. Surely my prayers are no more powerful than anyone else's. Maybe it was just that I was watching and my heart was positioned to follow the prompting of the spirit. Or maybe it's because He just wanted to see if I would obey. Whatever the reason, it brought to my mind that several weeks ago when I called and listened to a message on my answering machine from a precious lady in our church who called to let me know she had been praying that morning and the Lord had prompted her to pray for me! She was just calling to let me know she was praying and making sure I was OK. Our church is so big now, that I don't even get to see her most Sundays, and I know that I hadn't shared with anyone my struggles (because I don't do that...at all....and it's not always a good thing) so how overwhelming it was for me to get that call. It was just the Lord's way of letting me know that He had not forgotten me, and He was helping me through, and boy did I need it.
It has made me realize that anytime the Lord prompts us to pray that it is so important to obey. There are lives, hurts, grief, spiritual battles, and more that hang in the balance. What a precious gift it is to be able to go the the Father on someones behalf...fighting with them....often times when they are unable to fight for themselves.
So, now I have a new hero in today's world. A man whose life was being destroyed by sin, but who God wanted to use to bring honor and glory unto him. A professional athlete that my son can look up to. Someone who is not ashamed to give thanks to his "Lord and Savior Jesus Christ" in front of millions of people. And it seems I also have a new baseball team to pull for and a new favorite player!!
Sounds to me like he's living in a spacious place...delighted in by the Father, and rescued. Psalm 18:19. And isn't that what life in Christ is all about?
Blessings!
Joy
Tuesday, June 03, 2008
Simple Pleasures
Simple pleasures. I'm rediscovering these as my life has taken a major shift from being overly busy to being normal, and I'm loving every minute of it.
Here are some of the simple pleasures I've rediscovered:
1) Reading a book ~ for pleasure sake only. Not a book that enhances knowledge or causes your mind to flex, but a book simply read for the great story it tells. I would rather read a book than watch T.V. And after over two years of denying myself this treat, you can bet I have a lot of reading to make up for.
2) Watching a TV show for pure enjoyment. Sure, my TV has been on much while I was in college, but it was on Hannah Montana or The Suite Life of Zach and Cody. Never on shows that I like to watch, but now, I can actually sit in front of the TV and watch a show and not feel like there are so many other things that must be done and papers to write, and enjoy it. Isn't it just great for my husband that I like watching the sports as much as he does?
3) Fixing Dinner ~ I'm sure some of you just fell on the floor at that one, but really, when one actually has time to think about what to cook, and can actually plan it out, there is pleasure in your family eating your meal and enjoying it.
4) Movie night with a girlfriend ~ Being able to plan for someone to come over and actually spend some time relaxing with conversation and a good movie is nourishment to the soul. I plan on making this one a habit.
5) Enjoying one of Joel's ball games without some type of school book in my hands or the car waiting for me. Really being able to relax and be in that moment with him is something that I haven't been able to do, but now that I don't have so many other things on my mind, I am able to really enjoy his progress and games with him. How much have I missed out on??
6) Sitting at the movies with my love's arm around me! This is something that I will never get tired of, I will always treasure, and will still enjoy when I'm 90 years old. We spent the evening at the movies tonight, and while I was sitting there enjoying Iron Man with him (it's a GREAT movie, by the way), I tried to take a snapshot in my mind of the moment, simply because there was so much pleasure in it. A great movie, the weight of his arm on my neck, his hand rubbing my shoulder. It doesn't get much better than that!
7) Sunday evenings. Every Sunday evening since I started school, I have spent it finishing up assignments for the week, rushing to get everything turned in by the deadline, and reading/contributing to many discussion board posts. However, with graduation, I have found that I have my Sunday evenings back, and I now know how much I truly missed them. And it also makes me wonder how I ever survived without them!
and
8) Writing to be able to share. Not for a grade. Not a two page paper to be turned in on Sunday evening by midnight. Not a research paper. Not even a topic for sharing with others. Writing to put in print what is churning in my heart or my head. Writing to record a memory so I don't ever forget. Writing to leave a legacy for my children. Writing to share a truth with a friend.
I am sure as the days continue on, I will rediscover more and more simple pleasures that I have missed out on. I will be sure that when they come along I will once again be truly amazed at how much God loves me and thankful that my eyes and heart is open to enjoy the moment.
Blessings!
Joy
Here are some of the simple pleasures I've rediscovered:
1) Reading a book ~ for pleasure sake only. Not a book that enhances knowledge or causes your mind to flex, but a book simply read for the great story it tells. I would rather read a book than watch T.V. And after over two years of denying myself this treat, you can bet I have a lot of reading to make up for.
2) Watching a TV show for pure enjoyment. Sure, my TV has been on much while I was in college, but it was on Hannah Montana or The Suite Life of Zach and Cody. Never on shows that I like to watch, but now, I can actually sit in front of the TV and watch a show and not feel like there are so many other things that must be done and papers to write, and enjoy it. Isn't it just great for my husband that I like watching the sports as much as he does?
3) Fixing Dinner ~ I'm sure some of you just fell on the floor at that one, but really, when one actually has time to think about what to cook, and can actually plan it out, there is pleasure in your family eating your meal and enjoying it.
4) Movie night with a girlfriend ~ Being able to plan for someone to come over and actually spend some time relaxing with conversation and a good movie is nourishment to the soul. I plan on making this one a habit.
5) Enjoying one of Joel's ball games without some type of school book in my hands or the car waiting for me. Really being able to relax and be in that moment with him is something that I haven't been able to do, but now that I don't have so many other things on my mind, I am able to really enjoy his progress and games with him. How much have I missed out on??
6) Sitting at the movies with my love's arm around me! This is something that I will never get tired of, I will always treasure, and will still enjoy when I'm 90 years old. We spent the evening at the movies tonight, and while I was sitting there enjoying Iron Man with him (it's a GREAT movie, by the way), I tried to take a snapshot in my mind of the moment, simply because there was so much pleasure in it. A great movie, the weight of his arm on my neck, his hand rubbing my shoulder. It doesn't get much better than that!
7) Sunday evenings. Every Sunday evening since I started school, I have spent it finishing up assignments for the week, rushing to get everything turned in by the deadline, and reading/contributing to many discussion board posts. However, with graduation, I have found that I have my Sunday evenings back, and I now know how much I truly missed them. And it also makes me wonder how I ever survived without them!
and
8) Writing to be able to share. Not for a grade. Not a two page paper to be turned in on Sunday evening by midnight. Not a research paper. Not even a topic for sharing with others. Writing to put in print what is churning in my heart or my head. Writing to record a memory so I don't ever forget. Writing to leave a legacy for my children. Writing to share a truth with a friend.
I am sure as the days continue on, I will rediscover more and more simple pleasures that I have missed out on. I will be sure that when they come along I will once again be truly amazed at how much God loves me and thankful that my eyes and heart is open to enjoy the moment.
Blessings!
Joy
Thursday, April 03, 2008
Where in the world are you?
"I haven't seen a spacious place blog."
"I was looking at your blog but it hadn't been updated!"
"Where have you been Joy?"
Well, here I am! In the smack dab middle of chaos right now, but it's going to be that way for only a few weeks more, so I can endure.
In the past several months, so much has happened. I'll recap quickly!
Joel (my darling son in the 8th grade) did something I never thought he would do, and that was be in a musical. And he sang, really, really sang! In a microphone and everything. And more than that, he sang to me! I am thankful for his willingness to try something new and different for him. His father and I both knew how big of a leap this was for him, as well as how far out of his comfort zone he went, and I could not be prouder. But more than that, we (Joel and I) have a song. The guys who were in the musical sang several Billy Joel songs. One that I knew that Joel had a special part on was "She's got a way". This is one of my favorite songs of his, and I was excited to watch Joel sing it. Imagine how suprised I was when a picture of Joel and I filled the whole back of the stage when the song began. I was in shock! Joel and his Dad went through my box of pictures and Joel picked out a picture of the two of us together. It was sweet and touching and all I could think of for several days later is that now every time I hear that song, my heart will immediately take me back to my 13 year old son and the moment that was ours alone. Everyone can sigh now!! That's Joel there in the far right of the picture.
Joy
"I was looking at your blog but it hadn't been updated!"
"Where have you been Joy?"
Well, here I am! In the smack dab middle of chaos right now, but it's going to be that way for only a few weeks more, so I can endure.
In the past several months, so much has happened. I'll recap quickly!
Joel (my darling son in the 8th grade) did something I never thought he would do, and that was be in a musical. And he sang, really, really sang! In a microphone and everything. And more than that, he sang to me! I am thankful for his willingness to try something new and different for him. His father and I both knew how big of a leap this was for him, as well as how far out of his comfort zone he went, and I could not be prouder. But more than that, we (Joel and I) have a song. The guys who were in the musical sang several Billy Joel songs. One that I knew that Joel had a special part on was "She's got a way". This is one of my favorite songs of his, and I was excited to watch Joel sing it. Imagine how suprised I was when a picture of Joel and I filled the whole back of the stage when the song began. I was in shock! Joel and his Dad went through my box of pictures and Joel picked out a picture of the two of us together. It was sweet and touching and all I could think of for several days later is that now every time I hear that song, my heart will immediately take me back to my 13 year old son and the moment that was ours alone. Everyone can sigh now!! That's Joel there in the far right of the picture.
So what else is going on? Soccer is in full swing, baseball has started, too. Cheerleading and piano are keeping Julia busy right now, but it's almost time for softball to start. I did my student teaching in February and now I'm in the final 6 weeks of my classes and then Graduation is May 9th. There are no words to even describe how exciting that is. I have a red permanent marker to mark "finish your college degree" off of my to-do list.
What's amazing is that with everything that's going on, God is still finding me and speaking to my heart in such profound ways that I hadn't ever even thought of before. I feel somewhat like Mary in that all I can do is soak them in and ponder them in my heart. It's not quite time for sharing yet, but maybe soon.
So for all of you looking for me, I'm still here. IzitJo - my new friend from Australia, your post have encouraged me along, too.
Blessings!Joy
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Eternity Wasn't Enough
We had a young man come and speak at our church several Sunday's ago, and the words that were so simply spoken have made a lasting impression on my heart that must be recorded for my children in the future and must be shared with someone else that may need to hear them.
In his struggle to really feel and know that God loved Him, he began asking God about His love for him. He was struggling with not feeling that love on a continued basis. No different than it may be between a husband and wife, or between two close friends who are in different seasons in their lives and don't always show or give the love they need too.
So this young man began to ask God and question him, and this is what he realized.
God has always been. He's always known the future and the past and everything in between. So before the world was, God already had eternity. He didn't need or have to go through anything else to be loved more or be more powerful or more "God". But He loved us so much, that he just had to create the earth and the stars, and he had to create Adam and Eve and all of creation to make the world the way it is. And all of history had to take place and happen just so He could get to this point in time so that He could talk just to you and be with you and love you. He did all of that just so that we take on the form of man and love Him back. Eternity wasn't enough for Him ~ He wanted more ~ He wanted us ~ That's how much He loves us.
It's overwhelming....
Joy
In his struggle to really feel and know that God loved Him, he began asking God about His love for him. He was struggling with not feeling that love on a continued basis. No different than it may be between a husband and wife, or between two close friends who are in different seasons in their lives and don't always show or give the love they need too.
So this young man began to ask God and question him, and this is what he realized.
God has always been. He's always known the future and the past and everything in between. So before the world was, God already had eternity. He didn't need or have to go through anything else to be loved more or be more powerful or more "God". But He loved us so much, that he just had to create the earth and the stars, and he had to create Adam and Eve and all of creation to make the world the way it is. And all of history had to take place and happen just so He could get to this point in time so that He could talk just to you and be with you and love you. He did all of that just so that we take on the form of man and love Him back. Eternity wasn't enough for Him ~ He wanted more ~ He wanted us ~ That's how much He loves us.
It's overwhelming....
Joy
Saturday, January 19, 2008
A face lift!
So, you can see that the blog has had a face lift. Sprucing up. We all need it sometimes. And it was time for this blog to have one.
It is amazing to me how just a few changes on the outside can make such a big difference on how we feel on the inside. At the start of a new year many of us make plans to spruce up the outside to reflect the change that we hope will take place on the inside. That's backward, you know. I truly believe that only when there is an internal shift are there ever truly changes made that will be visible for people to see.
Holding onto worry....let go and people will see the peace of your spirit. What about regret...let go and freedom will be heard in your laughter. Insecurities, too? Leave them at the feet of Jesus and be ready to be amazed by the power of his Holy Spirit in your life. A quiet confidence will take over and you will truly never be the same. Mourning and sorrowful on the inside...He will turn them into dancing and joy if you only let Him.
So this year instead of making resolutions about changes to the outside of me, I believe that I will be working on the inside of me. Once that takes place, everything else will just fall into place.
Blessings!
Joy
It is amazing to me how just a few changes on the outside can make such a big difference on how we feel on the inside. At the start of a new year many of us make plans to spruce up the outside to reflect the change that we hope will take place on the inside. That's backward, you know. I truly believe that only when there is an internal shift are there ever truly changes made that will be visible for people to see.
Holding onto worry....let go and people will see the peace of your spirit. What about regret...let go and freedom will be heard in your laughter. Insecurities, too? Leave them at the feet of Jesus and be ready to be amazed by the power of his Holy Spirit in your life. A quiet confidence will take over and you will truly never be the same. Mourning and sorrowful on the inside...He will turn them into dancing and joy if you only let Him.
So this year instead of making resolutions about changes to the outside of me, I believe that I will be working on the inside of me. Once that takes place, everything else will just fall into place.
Blessings!
Joy
Saturday, January 05, 2008
A Grandmother's Gift.
Tonight I lost my Grandmother.
Sadie Ardella Hall Hagee. 97. Wife, Mother, Grandmother, Friend, church member, inspiration.
She was all of those things and more. Even though she has spent the last several years of her life in a nursing home, I cannot recall one time going to visit her that she didn't have a smile on her face. Even when those around her were not happy or looked miserable, she never did. She didn't complain, but gladly accepted whatever was given to her with that same smile.
After my mom called and told me and I ran into my husbands arms, so many memories flooded my mind. How crazy that the first one was when she made a bed for Eric in the bathtub. Greg asked why Eric wanted to sleep in the bathtub, and all I could say was that he was always crazy like that, but he did, and the next thing you know there were quilts lining the bathtub and had a bed all to himself. Only at Grandma Hagee's.
When we would stay with her there was always work to be done around the house, so homesickness never really settled in with me and my brother until bedtime. She would just quietly lay on the bed with us and tell us stories of her childhood. Memories she had of things she did with her sister and memories of her mother. Those were the stories that soothed us to sleep.
From her I learned how to snap green beans, shuck corn, and Crisco a nose on someones birthday! I dreamed dreams of a young girl on the hill where their house was in Pulaski in a hand made swing in a dogwood tree put up by my grandfather. We watched the Facts of Life together laughing at Blair and Tootie, and played Chinese checkers when that was over.
After having grown up in the home of a minister, and being surrounded by Pastors, Preachers and their families all the time, it was my Grandmother Sadie who taught me how to be just a regular old Church member. A servant. Faithful and dedicated.
She took me with her to her quilting at the church on Tuesdays and I watched as she sat around with her friends making quilts and telling stories and prayed. When we stayed with her, she always took us with her to pick up her friend and her daughter to take to church because they didn't have a ride any other way. She did the things she did not because they were a part of her job description, but because she was a servant of the Lord. She taught me about visiting by taking me with her to see the shut-in down the street, and she showed me how to be a good neighbor by making sure her next door neighbor was OK, often by sending me over there to check on her. She reached out to others in the way that only a child of Christ can, and I was blessed to witness it. I helped her cook to take food to church meals and I always was able to find Reece Cups in her pantry ~ they were her favorite.
She was so proud of my father. I wonder if she knew when he was born, and she gave him the name David, if she was given revelation that he would be a servant of the Lord like his namesake. I do know that she was blessed. And her blessing ran down to all of us.
So tonight, there is no more frailty in her body. No more weakness in her bones. She is healed and whole loving on Jesus. I couldn't ask for anything more for her. She didn't suffer. She didn't take months and months to go down hill, but went in a moment. I wasn't there, but I'm sure that smile was still there on her face and not a complaint on her lips. I can only pray to go the same way when it's my time.
The next days will not be easy. But I am left with the comfort of knowing that when I last saw her a few weeks ago I was able to kneel down and put some slipper/socks on her feet. I was able to take what she taught me and turn around and give it back to her. Servant hood. What a wonderful gift. What a blessing. What a heritage.
And I leave with the realization that God must love me so much to put such a woman in my lineage. So to him I say a quiet prayer of gratitude.
Heaven's choir is a little louder tonight with her voiced raised in worship.
Sing, Grandma, Sing!
Joy
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